Forgiveness

The loose thread hangs bare, vulnerable
I see it there
I try to forget it; let it be
I can't
I pick
It unravels

I find another loose thread, at the edge
I know I shouldn't pull it
I want to let it be
I can't
I pick
It unravels

I find each thread
Each imperfection
I need to let them be
I can't
I pick
My self-assurance unravels

Now it's just a pile of threads
Loose yarn on the floor
I want to knit it back together
I can't
I sit
I slowly unravel

Sometimes I have a knack for pulling on every loose thread in my being until I unravel like a sweater and am about as useful as a pile of yarn, lacking form or function.  I wish this weren't the case.  I wish the confidence I seem to exude wasn't a farce, an act.  I want to understand how to forgive myself, and let the imperfections be.  I want to be able to grow and learn without constantly second guessing myself at every turn, every decision.